MENTORSHIP MONDAY: PART 1 – WITH LORA B
Over the years, I have realized that I am not only the product of my upbringing and surroundings, but of all the women who have intentionally spoken wisdom and encouragement into my life through mentorship.
There’s no denying that life can be tough. But it is so comforting to know that I am not walking out this journey alone! For the next three weeks, I will have the absolute honor and privilege of interviewing some of the most influential women in my life and sharing their responses with you!
This week, you will be hearing (or reading) about one of my favorite people in the world – Mrs. Lora Bradsher!
GET TO KNOW LORA!
I first met Lora about four years ago when I joined a small group through an organization called Community Bible Study, or CBS. It was one of the coolest experiences to join in community with people from all different churches, denominations, backgrounds, and stages of life to study the Word together. Lora served as my core group leader as we studied the book of Revelation before she was later asked to serve on the Leadership team.
Every week, I took a peek at her study notes and saw how colorful her bible was with words that were circled, highlighted, and underlined three times over with something written on almost every inch of the margins. The questions and comments she made in our group were always so insightful and you could tell she lived her life in constant, purposeful humility. She also attended CBS with her husband so I was able to get a glimpse of the way they interacted with one another every week. After only a short time of knowing her I thought to myself, “This is the type of woman I want to emulate.”
I’ll never forget the time I asked her to meet me out for lunch thinking we could meet at Panera or something similar to that. But instead, she reserved a time for us to have high tea at the O. Henry Hotel. That’s just the type of person she is! No matter what, whenever you’re around Lora, she makes you feel like the most special person and her #1 priority.
Since our first meeting, we’ve shared countless conversations regarding life, love, leadership, and legacy. It’s been a journey full of fun (and funny) moments mixed with some messy tears and trials as well. I will always be so thankful for the role model that Lora has been to me, whether she was aware of it or not!
THINGS TO CONSIDER WHEN FINDING A MENTOR
Since the very beginning, God designed us to live in community with one another and serve as role models for generations to come. But just because someone is older doesn’t always make them a solid mentor! As the old adage goes, you are who you surround yourself with!
Paul and Timothy are often used to depict the importance of spiritual mentorship and how beautiful it can be when it is done well. Although Paul was initially like a teacher to Timothy, their relationship soon morphed into one like a father and son. The key is to find a mentor who lives their life in such a way that as you grow closer to them, you are pointed even closer to Christ!
“Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge they younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.”
Titus 2: 3-5, NIV
So before you ask someone to serve as a mentor in your life, here are some important questions to consider:
- Is this person mature in their faith and a strong believer?
- Would you be comfortable enough to share one of your darkest secrets with them without a fear of judgment?
- Is this person someone that you look up to personally, professionally, and spiritually?
- Do other people close to them also speak highly of this person?
- Does this person embody traits and habits that you also want to emulate?
- Do they also have people in their life that serves as a mentor for them?
And as people continue to pour into your life, you should also strive to do the same with younger women in your circle as well. Sometimes it really is true that as we get filled up, we are able to pour more out!
Q & A WITH LORA B!
Below are the responses to six questions I asked Lora on the topic of life and mentorship! Lora, I want to publicly thank you for your vulnerability and transparency in your unique responses. I am so thankful for who you are and your heart to encourage and impart your wisdom to young women and all the generations to come. You have truly been such a blessing in my life as I am sure you are to so many others as well!
1. Think back to your life as a young adult… Did you envision your life as it is today?
The short answer to that question is both Yes and No. I always envisioned having a larger family and living near my family in Greensboro, NC but in a more rural setting like Summerfield (where I reside now). I saw myself living a ‘pretty simple life’ – working, raising my children, and being involved in my local church. And for the most part, that happened! I married my husband, Michael, when I was 21 years old but knew I wanted to finish college and begin my career before having children. Our first daughter, Taylor, was born about 8 years after we married, and we were eventually blessed with 4 beautiful kids!
But my life now isn’t always how I envisioned it to be because I thought I would work while raising my children. But eventually decided to stay home after the birth of our third daughter, Maddie. Although it wasn’t what I initially thought I wanted, it was truly a blessing to have the option to stay at home and make that decision for my family!
2. What is something you used to believe about yourself that you later found out to not be true?
Growing up, I taught Sunday school, participated in Girl Scouts, and tutored young children who were learning English as their second language. People used to ask me if I was a teacher and I would say, “Oh no, I could never be a teacher – I don’t like teaching.” The truth is that teaching was a huge source of stress and anxiety for me because I always thought that everything needed to be perfect. I thought that if I didn’t set everything up to be just right, then the kids wouldn’t learn exactly what they were supposed to. I didn’t believe I would be able to communicate the message I needed to in a way that would be understandable or relatable for other people.
But over the years, I’ve realized that I was focusing too much on the presentation aspect of teaching instead of something equally important – my actual relationship with students. Once I spent less time perfecting the message and more time getting to know each student for the unique person that they were, I learned that teaching is more about others and not about me! (Editor’s Note: Although Lora may not believe it for herself, she is an INCREDIBLE teacher! And has been asked to serve in numerous leadership positions because others see this same trait in her too.)
3. What has been one of the most significant events in your walk with the Lord? And how does that event still impact your life today?
I honestly can’t pinpoint one single event that has been significant in my walk with the Lord. Instead, I would say there have been many events and people that have strengthened me along the way. I have experienced many trials throughout my life where I’ve had to completely trust in the Lord to get me through. He carried me through every season and never left my side. Looking back, I know I came out of each hard season like a diamond in the rough. As difficult as the trials were, I emerged so much better and brighter than before. I have often said, especially during this pandemic, that I am so thankful to be a believer. Because even through all the craziness, chaos, and unpredictability, I know God is in control and I can trust Him completely to take care of me.
4. What is your life verse? And how did that come to be?
One of my favorite verses comes from Jeremiah 29:11 –
“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
This verse is written on sticky notes, notebooks, planners, etc. throughout my house to remind me how the Lord has carried me through all the trials and hopeless times of my life. Even the ones I never thought I would get through or the times that I thought would never end. God gave me hope in knowing that He had a perfect plan for me. Knowing this is what continues to give me strength to continue fighting through all of the difficult times that come my way.
5. What goes through your mind when you recount the women who mentored you and helped shape the woman that you are today? What do you want your legacy to be?
There have been, and still are, several Christian women that I credit for shaping me into the person that I am today. My earliest memories of a mentor in my life were of my grandmother who loved the Lord and loved spreading the Word even more. She was involved in the church, read scripture daily, and prayed over her friends and family every day. Because of her, I learned the importance of staying in the Word and surrounding myself with other believers.
There were many others over the years that I saw as Christ-like reflections in how they handled everyday situations, relationships, and emotions. I thank God for these ladies and pray that I could leave a legacy as such: loving the Lord with all my heart, soul and might, and loving others well. I want to be an encouragement to others to do the same!
6. If you could ‘pey it foreword’ and give one piece of advice to this current generation of young women, what would it be and why?
If I could give a piece of advice to this younger generation, it would be to keep God at the center of your life. When I am God-centered, earthly enticements lose much of their attraction and the craziness and chaos of this life begins to calm. My desires, relationships, and attitudes are altered to be more of a reflection of Christ.
I would also tell this younger generation of women to BE YOU! Whenever you feel inadequate or have the temptation to compare yourself to others, remember that you are God’s unique creation. Psalm 139:14 reminds us that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. God’s ways are always perfect and He has an incredible plan and purpose for your life!
Sometimes, all we want or need to hear from others who have lived through seasons ahead of us is that God’s purpose for our life will prevail even if it’s not how we always envisioned it. And the negative things we think about ourselves are not definitively true – sometimes we just need to shift our perspective! Even in the hard places of this life, there is a purpose for the pain. This week, I hope you follow Lora’s advice to be you and step boldly into the calling that God has placed on your life!
In the words of Lora B who always ends her messages in this same way, “enJOY” your week!
